I'm fighting for a lost cause
A one sided battle...
One that I know I'll never win
But why am I still fighting?
You don't even care anymore do you?
The way you reply me...
The way you coldly brush me aside...
I...
I just want to be near you...
Is that so wrong in itself?
Do you have to slip yourself away till this extent?
It's breaking me...
And to fight off this fear, this sorrow...
It's taking everything
To pretend, to act like I'm strong
Like I'm a newly reborn person who doesn't know a thing about emo
Yeah I try to tell myself that..
But it just keeps haunting me
Maybe emo is my corner stone
Sigh what am I even writing right now...
I'm all alone and I need you now...
What did I do wrong?
Or maybe what I should be asking is why not?
Am I really that far off from your ideal notion of a guy?
Yeah, I'm lame, I'm sappy, I'm short and i'm indecisive...
But I truly truly love you...
I can't promise that my actions won't hurt you
But at least I'll try my very best to keep you happy...
Cause your smiling face is all I wanna see
Especially if I'm the one who cause you to smile
I won't be like Hong Lin or whoever that ass is...
Who only turn to you for comfort as and when he felt like it...
I treasure you from the bottom of my heart...
Sigh whatever is the point of saying all this?
As if you'd know how I feel...
As if you're gonna read this post...
Even if you do...
I'm just your hang out, have fun kind of friend aren't I?
Whom you can always replace with someone else...
God, if you're listening to this sinner
I ask you to grant me just one thing..
Maybe you could just grant me amnesia...
I don't really care how..
All the memories...
Are bringing me more pain as I recall them every single day...
Maybe it would have been better to forget everything..
And forget her totally...
Like she never existed...
Then we'd go our own separate ways...
And let her live happily too without this obsessed maniac looking for her every now and then...
And me?
Maybe i'll just be an empty shell who has no memories whatsoever
But I don't mind...
Cause the moment she left
Was really when I felt lost without anything anymore..
