Thursday, June 23, 2011

Fuck life...
It seriously feels like a delusion...
Just earlier on today we were having fun...
What a freak accident...
It looks like all along it's still my one sided thoughts...
As always...
And now I'm left all alone...
In this cold and empty house...
I cried like I never cried before...
Screamed like I never screamed before...
How am I gonna get through this now?
Live rounds tomorrow...
Should I use them?
I don't believe it...
There's not gonna be you in my life anymore...
Audrey................................
Sigh...
I dont even know what I wanna write anymore...
Don't feel like doing anything anymore....
Fuckfuckfuckfuckfuck sigh

Thursday, June 16, 2011

Well looks like I kinda forgot about this blog...
With all the random musings and stuffs...
So yea...I POP--ed, POC-ed and now I've got 1½ years of ns left...
Things are going kind of great right now I guess...
Though they weren't always this way...
I'm glad I didn't resort to those bullshits even when I really felt like it...
When u kept me away...
When others ostracize me...
When everything just felt so gleam...
I held on...
Maybe things are starting to look up for me...
I've got uni admission...
I think I'm a much more mature,stronger and independent guy...
Bleh, whatever...
But what matters the most and makes me happy these days...
Is YOU...
I don't know if u're finally willing to give me a chance or something....
But I do hope so...
I've decided that I'm gonna tell u soon...
I kinda found this while looking around randomly on the net...
I think it's quite true and meaningful...

You may not be her first, her last, or her only. She loved before, she may love again. But if she loves you now, what else matters? She’s not perfect – your aren’t either, and the two of you may never be perfect together but if she can make you laugh, cause you to think twice, and admit to being human and making mistakes, hold onto her and give her the most you can. She may not be thinking about you every second of the day, but she will give you a part of her that she knows you can break – her heart. So don’t hurt her, don’t change her, don’t analyze and don’t expect more than she can give. Smile when she makes you happy, let her know when she makes you mad, and miss her when she’s not there.
— Bob Marley

So I'm hoping this is how it is for us too :)